OVER THE COUNTER or OLD FAITHFULS?

I took a sick day today. I tried to avoid it, I really did.

I indulged the over the counter "preventative medicine" thing the night prior, but all that did was give me the Nasty Gnome, running through my dreams, throwing marshmallows at my fat, left cheek. I should have stuck with my Old Faithful remedy but, I decided to be responsible and try the mainstream variety. When  I woke and peered from the darkness, I knew this day was doomed. 

So, back to the bed I crawl, begging mercy from the Nasty Gnome to let me be. DInG DoNg, RAp, RAP, CLICK! Door opens.... ugh, the door, the bug man is here to spray. I completely forgot. I told him to do his thing and spray around me as best he could...now my dreams are in Kodachrome...nice! Thanks Gerry Bugman Garcia. Another round of psychedelic sleep, Gnomes and then....I'm up...again.

I can't take another dream of Nasty Gnome vs. Hong Kong Phoey fighting over Alice in Wonderland for the last Mary Jane candy in Willy Wonka's Bar with all the characters from The Beatles Yellow Submarine animated series singing the lyrics of Kum ByYa to Ozzies Ironman. I don't even think Sheen could have handled this alternate world. I've really got to get over this, I really do!!

This time Old Faithful is goin' down the tube. FINALLY SWEET RELIEF!! My passages have opened, my eyes have stopped watering and my voice nearly restored! And those beings that have been chasing me all night and day? They have finally tucked their creepy heads and shuffled their way back under my bed and to the dark closet where they belong.

Sick isn't purty around here, and it may not taste too good either, (the grammar and spelling sucks too, but I don't care right now) at least Sigmond and the Sea Monsters and H.R. Puff N' Stuff aren't dancing around my bed anymore with that little gay kid and that damn talking flute. Old Faithfuls. I think I'll stick with what I know.